10/23/10

WOW.  Am I still married??  The meds have gone to my head, I feel like a crazy woman!!  Except when I talk to my mom or my Lisa.  I wouldn't make it without either one of them.  Last night was rough, and admist my madness I called mom and it was all ok.  I actually laughed??  Oh Mom where are you now????  This 3 hour time difference SUCKS.  And Lisa?????  My best friend, my sister, my sweet!!!!  I MISS YOU!!!! The days are counting down for round one.  I am fully aware that this may not work for the first time, prepared for the 2nd and 3rd.  I believe a baby grows not only inside you but more importantly in your heart.  Well, the next phase officially starts tomorrow, shots, pills, and supp..... need I say more?  Whilst I am feeling so emotional, love to my family, I know we have had hard times, I have been difficult, however you all mean the world to me, Auntie Jan, you especially.  Love you.

10/21/10

Ok.  So much for losing almost 30lbs.  I now feel like a bloated pin cushion.  Crampy, emotional, sick to my stomach and can't sleep.  Wow, this is fun!!  Men get the easy part.  Blah!!  I just keep thinking of the potential outcome.  We have a notebook that we have been using for all the doctor appointments, also to document emotions, and letters to our future child.  Both of us have been writing.  I have read and re-read what Joe has written and it brings tears to my eyes.  I truly have a wonderful, caring husband.

10/19/10

Meds came today, wow, how confusing!!  There are so many different names that I can't even believe are in the English language!!  LOL!  And, I managed to figure it out and do the shot myself.  YAY! 

Last night was filled with strange dreams and I swear I woke up every hour on the hour.  I am guessing it is normal to be excited and nervous.  Joe and I have been discussing life and plans, which I am sure will lead to more sleepless nights.  I know that we don't have a whole lot, but we have each other.  According to the doctors, due to my age and the issues that my body has been through, we had to proceed now if we wanted to try for a biological child.  That really hit me in several ways, I'm Old?  However, that really isn't the issue, woman older then me go through IVF all the time.  It is just my body.  So, here we are...  : )

10/18/10

Today we met with the wonderful nurses and doctor at the SHER Institute.  We have met with them in the past couple months and it is finally time to start the IVF process.  Blood work and urine samples for both Joe and I and (yet another) ultrasound.  We recieved our schedule from our nurse, Amy, and begin the meds tomorrow.  Joe and I have been so through very much in our 10 years together, including miscarriages, etopic pregnancies, etc.  IVF treatments have come so far since we tried approximately 10 years ago.  The SHER Institute is absolutely wonderful and so knowledgeable.  (http://www.haveababy.com/)  There is no guarantee that the proceeddure will work but we are very hopeful.  We are ready to try up to three times, fully aware that if it does not work for us that there is a baby out there that may not be growing inside me but in our hearts.
My goal with this blog (I've never done one before...) is to further document the process, emotions, joy and possibly pain of our journey.  Maybe it will give others hope and keep family/friends updated.  Please feel free to comment and add questions, send prayers, love, and your stories.  Love to all!!